You should never feel like you're stuck in a relationship, staying simply for your partner's benefit. This isn't only unfair to you; it's unfair to your partner, who deserves someone who really loves her as more than just a friend. Still, it's not an easy thing to do. If you partner is needy and clingy, leaving them can feel close to impossible. This is why so many guys are stuck in unhappy relationships. Don't let that guy be you! As opposed to allowing the relationship continue along the road of unhappiness, you need to set a course to break up. Firstly, you have to decide with certainty that you're ready to leave. You must be 100% sure, so take some time for yourself just prior to the break-up. This will help you prepare yourself mentally, as you will be able to have your 'case', and answers to her questions, ready. At this time, you can summon up some of the power it's going to take to follow through. When you come back from your time away, tell her straight that you've decided that you need to leave this relationship. If you think that she will go berserk, doing this by phone or by writing a letter or email is probably best. Despite what you may have otherwise heard, sometimes it feels impossible to break up in-person, and it's better to do it over the phone or through a letter than to wait several years while you build up the courage. Tell her that it is something that your mind is made up on. Tell her that you don't regret your time together, and your feelings are more than just a passing phase, and that you have no future together. Be direct and honest, but don't be cold and heartless.

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So you’ve been wondering why you can’t get your ex back and you are pretty sure that you really want to hear the truth. Honestly, the truth can be quite harsh and it can leave you feeling pretty stung. Yet, the truth is often the one thing that can spur you on to make changes in your life that are positive and less painful. The first goal to get ex back is to look at some of the walls we put up ourselves.

It is part of the human condition to cause one’s own painful reality rather than become victim to it via someone else’s control. This is not to say that it is human nature, but a condition. One that has been taught through generations of others with the human condition. We threw out the love of our life to make sure that we were not the one that was dumped. Sounds familiar?

Weight gain is another way we tend to protect ourselves. We look into fat loss solutions that don’t involve giving up the candy, the salty snacks, and the unhealthy meal patterns we have going on. This is often because we aren’t really motivated to lose the weight.

We can drown our faces in the finest beauty cosmetics but if we feel unsafe being loved we will throw daggers at the world and keep everyone at arms length. We feel the uglier we can become the safer we are from someone’s ill intentions. We are truly just trying to protect ourselves. We shield ourselves from the potential for pain by shielding ourselves from the potential for love.

We are a people trying to protect ourselves in any way that we possibly can. We don’t want to become a victim of anyone’s and so we victimize ourselves instead. We try to get better jobs, more money, and better spouses by reminding ourselves over and over again that we are not worthwhile people.

This is a pattern that so many of us share we could be tempted to call it human nature. But it isn’t, as human nature is to love, accept, and become enlightened. We do these things to ourselves so that we may feel free from the control of others and that we can determine our own level of hurt. We give that to no one.

We work very hard at developing these ideas and then coming up with behaviors that seem to work, almost. We still feel pain and loneliness and anger but we don’t allow someone in to hear about it. We develop the strong sense that our own love for ourselves is somehow wrong and indecent when in fact it is the greatest gift you can offer to your own heart.